Wednesday, May 1, 2013

A/S/L


Hey, how are you?
I'm good how are you?
Fine, just chlling ASL?
19/m/usa
Cool I'm 18/m/usa
Nice are you white or black?
Black
-Logs off-
Hey, what's up?
Not much just hanging around.
Cool, ASL?
20/m/usa you?
18/m/usa. Gotta pic?
Yeah hold on. Sent. Do you?
Yeah, gimme a second. Sent.
I didn't know you were black.
Is that a problem?
-Logs off--
Hi.
Hey, ASL?
18/m/usa you?
22/m/usa what are you here for?
Whatever comes my way
Yeah?
Yeah.
Here's my pic.
Hot, here's mine.
-Logs off-
Logs back in
Looking for a masculine, young athletic preferablly white guy to talk to.
Message me...but please no dirty monkeys.

Are you starting to notice a trend?
That these seemingly isolated instances of events
Are nothing more than coincidences
Based on preferences bound up in different colors of skin
And as hard as it is not to sound like I'm complaining
And trying to wring some guilt out of the last vestiges of racism remaining
You can't help but notice a trend

AllAmericanBoy26's profile says I'm blocking more Chinese than the Great Wall.
TanDream18 says if another one of those black gays comes up to me on the dance floor
I might just have to lock myself up in a bathroom stall
And puke because there is nothing more unattractive than a black gay dude.
JockBro26 says don't even get me started on those Hispanics.
Don't even get me started on how they make me sick.

Are you starting to notice a trend?
A preference.
An affinity whatever you wanna call it.
It's pervasive and no matter how many ways you call it out
It shifts gears and reacclimates itself until it's as mundane as the weather and says I'm here to stay.
Just look at the It Gets Better campaign.
What faces do you see?
Because when I look I don't see many faces that look like me.
And you know it gets really scary when the subliminal message is
That it does indeed get better but only for a select few
Not for anyone who looks like you

43% of black gay youths have thought about committing suicide.
And how many have you actually heard about that did in this wide
Net of information that we call the media.
Because I could count for days the number of
Tyler Clementis, Jamie Hubleys, Ryan Halligans, Bobby Griffiths, and Jamey T. Rodemeyers
Who ended it because they felt mired in the unyielding hatred of a small number of small minds
But what about the Raymond S. Chases, Carl Joseph Walker-Hoovers, Jaheem Herreras, and Joseph Jeffersons
Whose stories were confined outside the limits of the mainstream
Who decided that their deaths weren't important enough to be screened.
Were they the same people who decided that my people's only role in their community
Was as a vector for HIV
For AIDS
Have you ever wanted to waive a birthright?
When those oh so subtle stares that
Say you don't belong here
Drive home the screws that reinforces
The locks that make
You feel locked in your own body
Bound in your skin like a book
No one has the time to read like you
Were penned by an author on the side who lost the war
Like instead of Mary Magdelene you were just some common whore
That Jesus laid his hands one once or twice
In the testament and if you ever try to testify
They'll silence you and every practiced line
That's the cultural atmosphere
The social environment
Plants are at an advantage when it comes to growing because when they are raised
In an incompatible environment they just die
But people are not so lucky
They find any way to grow
Even if its crooked
Even if its with their heart growing inside out on their sleeve
I'm sorry
I can't be another Raymond Chase, Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, JAheem Herrera, or Joseph Jefferson
I can't be part of that 43
I have to try
Anyway I can



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