Civilization

I stand among fading columns

And a crumbling amphitheater

Spectator to the specters of

A time gone by so quickly

It feels like lifetimes ago

Passerbys with inquiring minds

Stop by and wonder

What was this for?

What did they do here?

Who built this monument?

It's such shoddy craftmanship.

How could they think this would ever

stand the test of time?

I am the only one left

With the answers to their questions

With the knowledge to unlock

ancient secrets.

With clenched fist

And heavy heart

I tell them:

This is where we fucked!

This is where we bathed together!

This is where we made promise, after promise,

after promise, after promise, on the premise

that we could love each other in the ways that we needed.

This is where our love fell down!

Where it crumbled to the floor.

Because it was built on the lie

that you could love me the way I needed

And that I could trust you to do so.

Now the history of our civilization

Sits squarely on my shoulders

Gestates in the squirming chasm

Of my gut

And for the first time

I wish I didn't have

The heart of a poet

The heart of someone who can

Spin beauty from horror

There is no beauty in this

I would rather the heart

Of an archaeologist

Or an historian

Someone who can look upon the past

And not be sad that it's over

But glad that it happened.