More Sun than Flower

When I die

Lay me down like Autumn

I wanna be as frank with my death bed sheets

As the fall is with the leaves

Reassure me that like bare trees I can’t hide anything

Tell me that the dark in my hide is brightened by the brilliance

Of a springtime mind

Give me spring when winter is too persistent

Break my snowflake gush

With rosebud bloom

Snatch my winter snow blanket

And give me a spring shower curtain

Cause when I wash myself in the change

That only equinox can bring

I don’t want it to splash out onto my

Summer seams stitched with sunlight

Stitched with lightning bugs

Caught in mason jars

That used to be moonshine jars

Till the moon found out we were stealing her glow

When the moon casts her glow on my face

For the last time

Plant me in Georgia soil

Pray that I become a giving tree

Pray that I can cultivate the empathy that knows

What a sunflower feels like when it loses its mind

Over the idea of having more sun than flower

Fertilize me with the irony that

I had to vegetate to learn that the meaning of selflessness

Is me dropping my leaves to the ground like fall does

Cause then I’ll know what it’s like

Not to hold on so tight

There was nothing I could do in the first place

And thank god

There was nothing I could do in the first place

And when my roots are transplanted to the second place

Trim me down to bonsai size

So I can know Zen when I look at a giant pecan tree

And think damn

There’s nothing I’ve wanted to be more than me

And the Earth is so much more than our casket

Than our dumping ground

Than our heat sink

When I die I want to go to heaven

And heaven is right here under our feet