This Body

A black body is an idealized
Physical object that absorbs
Any and all light
And doing so perfectly
As such not extant in nature

This is my body
It absorbs shame
Like a sponge
It is not hard
It has curves in places
That should be straight
And thin like the sheets
of a magazine

I often do not eat
For fear of pushing my waistline
Over the edge
Unacceptable
Look in the mirror
And there is too much to grab

This is my body
It walks like an apology
Aware of steps it should have taken
To prevent itself from ever reaching
It's current state
And beating itself up over it

I have given myself up
To the appraising hands of readers
Mastered in the language of braille
With lack of a word that can translate to appreciation
In their vocabulary
Less reading
More grave digging
I am dead in their eyes
Cold and mute
Like a gravestone sprung up from the ground
Participating in life
As a marker for death
While their shoveling hands
Become fluent in the language of desecration

This is my body
It is not a one liner
But it is always the punchline
Not sharp wit
But soft deflection of the hard questions

My body is dark
Like a mark of cosmic shame
Perfectly absorbing
any and all light around it
Consumer and destroyer
As such not celebrated in nature